Inevitably, I see many posts in support groups for recovery from Narcissistic abuse, asking if the Narcissist actually loves their victims or if they can change? The short answer to this is, no.
Narcissists are deeply broken. Incapable of loving anyone, not even
themselves. Although they are very focused on themselves and portray an
ego like no other (in most cases).
themselves. Although they are very focused on themselves and portray an
ego like no other (in most cases).
They secretly hate themselves and are full of self-loathing, have low
self-esteem... and so they reflect that onto their victims, making their
victims feel the same way they themselves do.
self-esteem... and so they reflect that onto their victims, making their
victims feel the same way they themselves do.
While at the same time demanding that their victim "supply" them with
love, affection, admiration, etc. Hence the term "supply" when talking
about the victim of a Narcissist.
love, affection, admiration, etc. Hence the term "supply" when talking
about the victim of a Narcissist.
Narcissists don't actually treat their future partners, other children,
etc. better than their current victims. They simply move from "supply"
to supply... Playing "favorites" or manipulating.
Love-bombing and gaslighting are two of their favorite methods to
manipulate and control their victims.
etc. better than their current victims. They simply move from "supply"
to supply... Playing "favorites" or manipulating.
Love-bombing and gaslighting are two of their favorite methods to
manipulate and control their victims.
Which is how they are able to keep their victims attached and in limbo
for long periods of time, years even, while also procuring new "supply"
and leaving more damaged victims in their wake.
for long periods of time, years even, while also procuring new "supply"
and leaving more damaged victims in their wake.
So, the Narcissist cannot actually love you, because he or she doesn't
actually love themselves.
actually love themselves.